Tasty Burger

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

The BEST burger I've ever eaten (yes you read it right)

Epiphanies (and burgers), I've had a few… but none quite like that at the Tolarno Bar last night. Modestly, Joeleee and birthday boy Dub had kept pretty quite about this fine institution on Fitzroy St in St Kilda. Most might associate this stretch of tarmac with a high likelihood of being bottled, but with the previously blogged GBC joing Tolarno on the same side of the road it is worth the risk, at least for now (more on this later).

With a long history dating back to 1886, Tolarno is a mixed institution, offering a bistro and hotel but it is the bar where the burger magic happens. Newbies, Sergio and I, make up the 4 who find themselves seated around a barrel table in the back room listening to Steve Earle. Pistol does the generous shouting and the ordering, but from what I gather, the latter is a simple affair, 'with' or 'without chips' being the only options. When they arrive they seem deceptively small on the large plates and it is easy to over estimate your ability to knock one over, an illusion only reinforced when you take the first delicious bite, but the inch thick patty soon puts a dent in your optimism. The buns are quite sweet, white, dense and real soft, the big strips of bacon have swiss cheese melted over them, even the beetroot that I normally hate feels at home in the mix of tastes which is set off perfectly by the Hewitson branded barbecue sauce that is smothered over the patty. This is one god damn muthaf*ckin tasty burger! It seriously is that good, one cannot help but be struck by it. You could very happily munch on these very regularly and, in fact, the barman that night recollects that he has eaten one a week for the last nine years!

I wish that I could say that he was going to eat them every week for the *next* nine years, but alas this tasty Tolarno tale takes a tragic twist. The bar and thus its burgers are shutting shop at the end of this month! Tolarnio and Lockiet, the star-crossed lovers…. how cruel to have discovered it so close to it's demise! For whatever reason the doors are closing on this St Kilda landmark and you have 25 days to get a burger in you. Personally, I don't want to dwell on the negative so I'll make the most of what I have and head back to Tolarno as much as my calendar and constitution will allow, I'd urge you all to do the same!



Post a Comment

<< Home