Tasty Burger

Saturday, September 30, 2006

Pure Lotus, Quanjude and Hooters

China. Was there anything worthy of burger or Dave-ness? Well no waves at all, the closest I got was SuZhou, known as "Venice of the East". Here you can be serenaded on boats and buy as much tourist booty as you can stuff into cheap plastic bags.

Early on Sunday I found some interesting stuff in Shanghai, notably the "Bund" (riverside area), where all the locals fly their kites and do tai chi. There was some Australian director down there filming a serious cinema flick but I couldn't work out who it was.

To Beijing and the compulsory duck restaurant Quanjude. This was an improvement on Hooters which was the last place we went in Shanghai, just to prove that Chinese girls can act like Texans. I did have a burger there -- not tasty.

Oh, back to Beijing and the duck, not bad - but actually not as flash as the one we had in Smith St, Fitzroy.

Which brings me to Pure Lotus. After a week of duck, pork, chicken feet, duck blood, beef, more pork and generally feeling like the floor of an abattoir -- I asked my vegetarian local colleague where to go.

She sent us to a place called Jingxin Lian which translates as "Pure Lotus". This is the best vege reaturant I have been to, anywhere, ever. Yes, they do the whole textured tofu thing, but flavour and presentation is incredible. They even emulated the Peking Duck experience from the night before. People say that the place is run by a monk, and many of the staff seem to be budhist themselves - their passion really shows.
They also do lots of drinks with yam -- because it is supposed to enhance your manhood or something. I didn't touch the yam juice but I did have the yam dessert which was wicked.





Wednesday, September 27, 2006

The gloves come off

No. Dub, serhio and I did not have a fight to the death with kippers. Title of this entry merely refers to the wetty gloves that had been the cause of such ruthless jibes as calling moi 'Glovey'... ouch. Vic weather is finally cooperating and the cold now feels like gentle kidney punch compared to the relative kick to the goolies of previous months. Don't throw those booties in the cupboard just yet, but real proper no-kidding spring surfing is just around the corner

The three of us head down to Torquay minus Zombie (who is almost certainly not finding surfage in China) and Joeleee (who has gone to NSW with that exact purpose in mind). Torqs is heaving with every grom and old fella from the greater west coast, leaving barely room to squeeze another 3 boards in, so we don't. Instead the rumbling beach break of Jan Juc beckons and we are soon testing our wave craft, trying to pick the nice left/right break from the majority wipe-out dumpers. We miss a couple and are subject to minor mashage, but occasionally there's gold and at least a few green faces are ridden. How invigorating, how much fun, how had I not been out for a paddle for a whole month? stupid stupid stupid...

The previous weeks F&C shop is again the only place open. Seems the weather knows it's spring but local purveyors of tasty burgers do not. Maybe we're going soft, maybe the grease was laid on exra thick or maybe it was the bevvies the night before but none of us can finish it... is it tasty this time round?... the jury is out. More excitingly we've got the next round of the 2006 Burger-off happening this weekend. There's been hype aplenty from this contender but can he put his burger where his mouth is? (well obviously he can or how would he ever eat burgers... but you know what i mean)

Updates/judgement after the weekend and some NSW stories of sunshine to make us jealous Joeleee?



Tuesday, September 19, 2006


After a fresh stock of toe jam and spiffy new combs at our fav local supplier (Strapper, bro), the Dubster and JC sprinted up the Torquay Hill only to be whelmed by little to no swell and a bunch of foam boards. Knowing we were pressing our luck because of a mild forecast earlier in the day, the 2-man posse cruised over to Jan Juc in hopes there might be something to tame... Hello!! a Junior's tourney obviously knew something about the forecast we didn't as the beach break was pumping 2-4 footers with the odd rogue wave providing enough dumpage and excitement to make Dub say.... "Whoooaaaa Nelly!" Looks can be deceiving - with waves pounding in the first few breaks it looked to be a challenge to break out to the back. But a little Dub-led perseverance and avoiding the bigger sets drew the 2-dude crew out the back with little effort. What that left us was a heap of white water - cue www.DubGrin.com - and/or a few daring attempts at some serious green. JC opted for the mellowed out last-of-the-set small-to mid range and grabbed a decent one or two green like hills, albeit not without a two-fold share of semi-spectacular wipe-outs and missed-ops.

Owing to the vast dearth of tasty burgers in the greater Torquay area, we headed to the Jan Juc village only to be reminded (once again) that the cafe is usually closed and the pub doesn't open until after some other time when we're not there... back to the local Fush n Chups shop. Apparently, we're memorable as the local gezza - lets call him Phil - noted our last visit. Mini chips (not the band) and 2 burgers with the lot and pineapple later, the standard FnC shop burger is quite tasty, although we both struggled at the end owing to runny egg and flimsy buns.

Rating: Tasty


Friday, September 15, 2006


Today's burger experience comes together almost too nicely (at least initially). I was really tired of the week and happy it was friday, then for lunch we go to a place called Thank God it's Friday! wow! how amazing is that?! ok not so amazing, but i figure if I can find a place called Fucking Hell it's Monday then i have got the week nicely bookended.

So anyway I order the World Famous Mushroom Onion Swiss [cheese] Burger which arrives in a big tower that requires a toothpick to hold its lid on. For you $14 you get tinned mushrooms, *raw* onion rings and a grey meat pattie. Some might blame the lunchtime conversation about vernix (one guy just had a kid), but i blame the offensive burger, definately not tasty! Thank God I'm not going there again........


PS someone else please go surfing this weekend while i'm away and write magical stories about endless clean face and before you knew it you'd surfed all the way to Sydney, i'll meet you at Bondi


Sunday, September 03, 2006

doin'... cathedral rock

mm and zombie took a few days off down in Lorne. the forecast was great weather but no surf turning to bad weather but good surf. actually the pulse came in late so wednesday was the day of choice. cruising back up the ocean road on wednesday morning, cathedral rock was the choice: a nice little right hander off the reef still with enough power to make things interesting, and a few local bogans to give the sense that the break was worth arguing about.

thursday was doing the tourist thing but stopped to check out Johanna, since the rest of the coast was flat. this shot is from a little down the road but gives the general idea - lots and lots of rips, no-one out and the "jaws" music playing in my head. mal stayed bolted on sven that day.

friday, bass strait was a lake. went back up to fairhaven for a paddle, an act of pure desparation.

on saturday a rush of sms's from a pack of pikers telling me no go. on the way back stopped in at bells to find the pulse on the way in, actually pretty good. lots of the green stuff, just how mal and i like it.

as i blog its sunday and safely at home -- hope you all dragged yourselves out and not too hammered..